Thursday, August 21, 2008

Do You Recognize This Woman?

A Caregiver's Vent

You cook all her meals, (often taking them to her in her bedroom), wash all the  dishes and do all of the grocery shopping.

You clean her house and clean her laundry.

You help keep her balance in the shower and then clean it when she's done.

You pick up the numerous items that she leaves and drops all over the house.

You run all of her errands and do your best to keep all of the bills paid on time.

You tend the garden and the house plants.

You take in the paper and take out the garbage.

You take her to the doctor, get her prescriptions filled, fill her medicine dispenser and then remind her to take her medicine every day, several times a day.

Your weekly schedule revolves around her doctor appointments as well as visits by her visiting nurse, physical therapist, et. al.

Despite the fact that all of her siblings have died prematurely from illness, she gives you an attitude when you remind her to take medicines.

She also has an attitude about the healthy diet that you try to prepare but often complains about her aches and pains.

She is quick to remind you that you've gained weight and need to do something about it. However, her weight gain is the result of all of her medicines and there is little that she can do about it.

When you ask her to lay out her clothes the evening before you have to take her out, she tells you that she doesn't need to.

And when you ask her to try on something that she hasn't worn in years she tells you that she doesn't need to.

You wake her up 3 hours before you're scheduled to leave for an appointment and somehow you still never get out of the house on time.

You try to fix her a special breakfast every Sunday. But when her friends or out-of-town relatives call at 1pm she tells them that she hasn't eaten yet.

If she gets to the mail before you do, she rips up the mail (with your name on it) if she thinks that it isn't important.

If she gets to the phone before you do, she'll tell you later that someone called for you and that's all she remembers.

When people telephone for you and she doesn't feel like calling you to the phone she tells them that you're asleep. However, if a telemarketer calls while you're in the shower or trying to work, she calls you.

Of course, sometimes I do hide in my bedroom and pretend that I am asleep.

Despite the fact the you have a multiple bathroom home and she has a bedside commode, she has to use the bathroom in which you're trying to take a shower, NOW!

One day a month a housekeeper comes in to help out. And for this reason, when this woman has guests who compliment her on the state of the home and/or the garden she replies, "I do my best but I do have someone come in and help me out". You just sit there and smile.

And if you utter a word of complaint about any of the above, she tells you that you have "the devil in you".

Do You Recognize This Woman?

If you do, please come get her and return my mother.


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